JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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