Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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