I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
