Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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