We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
