You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
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