i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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