I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Randomize
