stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
