She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
