when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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