I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
