My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
