girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
