"it" just moved
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Randomize
