its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
they need to just BURY HIM!
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
