guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
