i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
