yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
