I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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