The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
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