I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
The Olympian is in my bed
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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