FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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