real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
