He felt like a one man threesome
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
