I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
