yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I booty called her while she was in labor.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
