whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
one two three fourrrrnication!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
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