Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Can I color on your dick again?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize