i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Randomize
