Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
