Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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