I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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