so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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