dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
