My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
