Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
He felt like a one man threesome
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
