You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i dont even know how to be here
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
