PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
