Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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