dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
