your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
