Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
