Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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