yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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