To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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