my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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