You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
No subtext here. People are naked.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
There's always time for handjobs
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
