i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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