But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
